Sunday, January 23, 2011

Forgiveness, Virtues, and...Simba?

1/22/11

Lets face it. You know what I ate. This time I had hot chocolate as well. A bit bitter though. We left today for Sunio. Our purpose was to go to the temple of Poseidon. With a two-hour ride ahead of us I typed. I forgot to charge my computer last night, so I cheated to save some battery. I just opened a word document and then turned my screen off. Spelling accuracy drops a little as I didn’t know exactly where I was in the word and sentence sometimes. There were times where I would light my screen back up just so I could see what I had written. I kept getting lost in thought. You would too if you kept going by the Ionian Sea and other interesting terrain.

We couldn’t have asked for a more beautiful day. It was all bright sun and blue sky. Of course there were some clouds, but they never covered the sun for long. The temple to Poseidon is located up on this tall cliff next to the sea. With the spectacular views of the water it made sense why the temple was built there. I admit that I took more pictures of the water than I did the temple. It had the beautiful teal color of glacial water. Reminded me of home a little bit.

When we were done taking pictures and going around the temple we all got back on the bus and went down to a beach bellow. After all it was the Mediterranean. We couldn’t just pass up this opportunity to get in the water. Most of the group went to the bathrooms to change into shorts or swimsuits behind this little restaurant. Several people sat down to eat instead. There is only one word when it comes to swimming in January. Cold. Ok I can give you another few like stupid, brave, and even ignorant. It was by no means dangerous, unless you consider that numbness is an onset of hypothermia. It took me a while to get in. I hate being cold but I love water. Getting my feet in I started to tense up. In high school I used to have to do ice baths for my calves as I would get shin splints. These actually would make me feel sick as I would create such a huge difference in body temperature between my upper body and my lower. I learned I either had to over stimulate myself with loud music or, something I discovered as a senior, get my head wet too so that the difference in temperature would be way lower. Here I did the old fashioned way. Freeze yourself bit by bit. I would wade in, go back towards shore, and then go back in a little more. After midlevel I dived in. Salty. I forgot how much salt there is in bodies of salt water - hence the name salt water. I didn’t take a mouthful or open my eyes, thank you slight intelligence, but I couldn’t help myself from licking my lips a lot. I imagine the Mediterranean is more fun when the weather is closer to 90 degrees and not sixty with a breeze. Getting out I just wanted to stand in the sun. My goal was to soak up enough sun to make up for the lack of it from December to March. Eventually a few clouds covered the sun so I went and changed.

On the ride I typed again. My battery said it would only last three hours. I made it last four and have an hour left over. I love my Mac. Best battery ever plus it runs on so little power.

In my last blog I said, “I can’t lie.” I like that expression but the truth is I like the truth and despise lying. Aristotle talks about how ethics are not innate, rather they are built by practice. If you make good moral decisions you will get pleasure out of life and happiness. By following good moral practices you become a moral being. By telling the truth, you become a more moral person and you become better at doing it. What I appreciate about truth is that it allows for making of good decisions. The truth can be painful, but knowing it allows you to do correct actions or precautions rather than blunder head long into something that creates bigger problems. I also like the truth because it supports other ethics. By knowing what the truth is about acting on your ethics you can create better outcomes and not be duped by morality. The morals of many people in the Nazi army were duped by their morality when they followed the moral of loyalty. They were loyal, but that loyalty blinded them. Had the truth been known and the question of “is this right” been asked to the group at large, I don’t think that they would’ve been duped. The truth a person is a person no matter what their race, religion, orientation, gender, or ethnicity could’ve gotten more people to act against the persecution of the Jews.

Back at the hotel most people ran once again for a gyro. At the top of the hotel the sun was wonderful. I shed my shirt and did a little reading. After finishing the Symposium I just sat in the sun and closed my eyes. Eventually the wind started to increase. I simply curled up on the wicker bench on my pad and started to doze. Eventually I turned back towards the sun again to warm my front. The wind eventually got me too cold to enjoy the sun. We were going to have class up on the roof so I ended wearing my polar fleece and down jacket as well.

Class was interesting. We finished the two Roth group summaries that were left. They were all on the Holocaust. The class conversation turned to forgiveness. There was a question Greg asked that I really wanted to write about. The problem was that I was writing down a different part of the conversation in my moleskin and lost the second question. Greg brought up how guilt is always tied to forgiveness. I don’t know if I was misunderstanding him, but I felt like he was saying that the point of forgiveness is to create guilt. I had issues with this because that ruins the point of forgiveness. Forgiveness is not done to create guilt but to release it. You can “forgive” someone to create guilt within them, but that does not really mean you forgave them as your actions were done out of spite – not true forgiveness. The word was used but not the nature of the word. We also talked about how forgiveness is a gift that we give. We don’t have to give it, but it is there to be acted on. Greg asked how forgiveness could be a gift if it had parameters. It isn’t a gift in that instance. I am not saying forgiveness is not a gift we can give, but rather that by placing parameters that require something of the offender is actually reconciliation. They are requirements that get the relationship back to where it was before the offense. The reason that forgiveness and reconciliation get mixed up, in my mind, is because they have the same result. When you forgive someone there is nothing being held against the other and one person doesn’t feel as if they have to do something to fix the relationship. Reconciliation is the same thing – only the offender has to earn it. In forgiveness, the fixed relationship is a gift where the offended lets go of the negative emotions aimed at the offender – allowing the negative feelings associated with the offended to drop from the offender. Balance is brought back either way. It is just a process of how. I feel that forgiveness with parameters for the offended though are acceptable. In order to truly forgive, with heart, soul, and mind, there needs to be a process of thought and release that the offended must go through. Sometimes it is quick and in some situations that process takes longer. Setting a parameter of time before this forgiveness can be considered helps maintain that the forgiveness is truthful. It is better to take years to reach a point where you can truly forgive someone than to make a hasty forgiveness that does not truly settle the issue inside a person, causing an eternity of negative feelings associated to one person.

After explaining one situation in which fake “forgiveness” can be used to create guilt and how it wasn’t forgiveness as the intent was wrong I wondered, is this how people master philosophy? We spew words in the hope of pulling the listeners that understand with us or to confuse the others so that they just pretend they understand and jump on the bandwagon with the few moments of clarity they had – or just because they trust the person? Creating a defense for an idea with the spoken word is much harder in one sense because you can’t always create an amazingly organized trail all the time that people can follow, especially when you get into complex ideas and have to make the trail as you go. The advantage is that most listeners can’t grasp the structure as well so the judging is a little lighter (unless the speaker is really bad). Socrates is amazing to me in this sense because, at least the way he was written, when he talks he leads people down paths of thoughts to reach good morals using logic. I feel like he knows the end point and skillfully creates all the dots to lead a person to the desired destination.

There was one point in the conversation where I saw several people nod at what Greg was saying – all I could think was are you listening to what he is saying? Cause if you were you should be shaking your head. What makes us suddenly change our mind and switch vantage points? Maybe I wasn’t yet convinced and didn’t get the one key point that made everyone else nod. Or maybe it was the just the “keep nodding and we can move on” tactic. Either way I feel like we are missing something – or I did.

Another question that was posed to us what “what are virtues?” For me virtues are positive qualities within a person that are generally held within respect by society as a whole. They are qualities that people reach for in their quest to become a better person. Now when asked the question of if there is a virtuous person I want to say no. Not because I don't believe that we can't have virtue, but when asked this question I feel like we are asked if there a completely virtuous person. I don't believe that there is, minus possibly Jesus Christ. That said I have seen people have virtuous qualities. Unconditional love, patience, and forgiveness. These qualities generally though are viewable only because of certain situations where they shine out. Because of this it is hard to see these virtues and they aren't always obvious all the time. Also we are human, and we are flawed. I find it interesting that all the Greek Gods were humanized by their lack of perfection.

I was actually quite entertained during class when someone started playing and singing “In the Jungle” off in the distance. Athens is a jungle in many ways. People going everywhere, animals roaming the streets, and graffiti that makes the buildings feel more like they are part of a dangerous forest than a civilized city. There are dogs everywhere in Athens. They run around, lounge in the sun, and they follow you everywhere until they reach the end of their territory.

We loved the first restaurant so much that we decided to come back to it again. I ordered lamb baked in clay pot. I didn’t enjoy picking around all the bones this time round but the buttered bread was good as usual. We did discover that the bread costs one euro per person – not per basket. I was glad that we demanded extra bread when the guy didn’t want to give it to us. Of course the restaurant loved us and brought us wine on the house. They really did appreciate our business considering we tipped well last time and that we have already come twice. The first time we spent nearly 500 Euro on all the amazing food. Not hard to see why they liked us. I wonder if they were trying to get us to come back again. I would go for more of that saganaki which I didn’t get this time.

We went down to the flea market but it was closed. Instead we got to see some of the more artful graffiti. I forgot to mention that I ended the previous night with gelato. That time I had a scope of pineapple and one of kiwi. Both were…I don’t know how to describe them really. I found myself caught in a position where I didn’t know if I really liked it or not. It was just so different from what I am use to with ice cream.

There have been two songs that I have heard over and over again in my room. Will will turn on the TV and flip through the channels everyday. Each time we end up at MTV. There are three songs that have played over and over. Playing God by Paramore, Animal by Neon Trees, and Grenade by Bruno Mars. Another video that caught my eye is Take That by The Flood. The reason this video stuck out is because it shows several great views of London from the water.

I just saw a great quote I thought I would share:

"The longer you wait for the future the shorter it will be."

Ruins of Delphi, The Hurt Locker, and Sleepless in Athens

1/21/11

We had to be up early for our ride to Delphi (Del Phee). Breakfast was amazing Why - because I had yogurt and lots of honey. So good! My stomach wasn't very happy with me though. It wasn't ready to handle the large amount I was consuming, not that I was eating THAT much, but it was twice as much as normal. Our bus ride was going to take three hours. Our trip was full of history and other stories about buildings around us as we went through the city of Athens. I heard all about the battle of Marathon, Oedipus Rex, the birth of Artemis and Apollo, and how Athena came to be the god of Athens and not Poseidon. They are all interesting stories if you want to look them up, I do love mythology, but I don’t really want to retell all these stories – especially Oedipus. We stopped at a convenience store (or something to that end) and got some food. I didn't really trust the sandwiches that were in plastic so I instead got a cheese pie, which was nice and warm. It was basically a pasty or croissant crust filled with feta cheese. It was delicious, but the feta kept trying to come out all at once as I would take a bite. The rest of our trip talked about Thebes and the area around Delphi.

We kept climbing higher and higher into the mountains. I learned that Greece was 95% mountainous. (This explains why the game Zeus rarely gave so little flat ground as the missions got harder.) Up top we had stunning views, blocked slightly by mist. Delphi is known for its oracle, which was said to be possessed by Apollo. The temple of Apollo is where this oracle would giver her prophases, interpreted by the priests, every month. Almost everything at the temple to Apollo was in ruins. Greece got the short end of the stick after being a ruling country of the region for centuries. They were invades by group after group after group. This had the slight negative effect of meaning the temple got raided by each group in turn. The Turks actually took most of the statues at the temple to decorate a grand location somewhere. If the ruins weren't impressive, there was the theater, the stadium, and then there was the huge mountain we were on. The rock face was jagged and beautiful with its mix of red and grey stone. There were also the remains of a temple to Athena (I think) as well as the remains of a huge gymnasium.

At the stadium Greg talked about Aristotle. He then mentioned The Hurt Locker. I hate this movie but it has lots of ethical stuff within it. The movie is about a bomb disposal team in Iraq. Their bomb dismantler, who is supposed to take the bombs apart, is killed in the first scene of the movie. He is then replaced with a reckless guy who puts everyone in danger over and over again but effectively dismantles bombs everywhere he goes. He places the mission as his top priority and safety as his last. Not just his safety, but his life and that of his comrades. I hated this movie, partly because I don't like this kind of suspense, and because of how it goes against my ethics - my value of life. I find it ironic that I say this. This guy is risking his life to make sure that innocent people don’t get killed and yet I feel like he is going against my ethics. I guess my objections come from the fact that he is putting more people at risk by his actions than necessary. It doesn’t help that I found this guy to be stupid because of his actions and a jerk. When he finally gets sent home he is shown with his wife and little son. What I find interesting is that he has been gone for so long that he doesn’t seem to know how to act at home. Not only that but he has a drive to get back to the war. I felt like he was an adrenaline junky rather than a man motivated to keep his family safe. He told his wife that the US needs him to get rid of IEDs but I feel like that is just an excuse for him to get his high. He misuses ethics by twisting them to his own purpose instead of a greater good. Our ethics shouldn’t be used as a means to an end but an end in themselves.

After making our way back down we got to see all the artifacts that had either been too big to carry off or had been hidden away and not discovered by the many different conquerors. After the museum we checked out the small structure that used to be the other temple.

On the way back we stopped at the same rest stop. I got a Kinder Bueno Bar. Its kind of like a wafer with four cream blobs covered in chocolate. It tasted great but was even better was what Greg offered me - a bite of an oregano chip, made by Lays. SO good! I immediately went back and bought a bag for myself. I don’t remember the rest of the trip home, mainly because I passed out. After a break in the hotel we gathered for food. Gyros. That’s all we wanted. I ended up getting a pork gyro from Sabbas and a lamb gyro from the second gyro place. It’s pretty neat to be there as these guys just cut the hot meat off the vertical rotating spit of meat. I actually liked Sabbas better. I didn’t like how the second place added fries to the gyro and the bread didn’t seem to be as good. It was also 10 cents cheaper at Sabbas.

We wondered down to the flea market. I was actually sent out of two places because of my gyro – funny, I thought it was a flea market – eventually I just wrapped it up and put it in my pocket so I could go around in places. It was crazy – the extent of the content in each store. Every turn was filled with clothes, shoes, or random items. It was an experience just to go down the street. All the different people, the calls of the merchants trying to sell goods, and the graffiti added to make a captivating environment in itself. I must say that the merchants and servers here can be like jackals. They keep biting at you trying to get you to sit down at their restaurant or they follow you around in the store commenting on everything you touch or see. The servers will offer you a table even if you just walked by and turned them down ten minutes before.

On the way back I got gelato! I got two scoops, one of forest fruits (fruit with coconut) and I also had tangerine. It was delicious but came at the hefty price of 3.50. I am not sure I was completely in love with it, but it was definitely worth the experience in Greece.

I couldn’t sleep. We tried to go to bed around 9:30 but it didn’t work. I would fall into this half awake stage where I knew I wasn’t sleeping. I got up three times during the night. It was only around 10:30 the first time. Not sure about the last two. Both times I went up to the roof in only shorts and my blue pullover fleece. The first time I stayed up there just long enough to freeze. It was raining and everything was slick. The last time I came up I brought the light blanket from the end of the bed with me. People were taking pictures of themselves and the Parthenon.

I went to the backside of the roof, something I hadn’t done and wrapped myself and sat looking at it. The people came around and started pulling the benches up vertically. I knew what was going on, they were trying to get the camera high enough so that it would take a good picture. I offered to take the picture for them. They thanked me and said they had decided not to ask me because I had just wrapped myself in the blanket. They asked if I was cold and I told them not really, which was true. Only my feet were. They asked if I was an American. I told them I was and that I was from Seattle, WA. They kind of said ah, lots of rain there so you must be used to it. I told them I was actually from Montana so I was more used to the snow this time of year. The younger woman confessed she had only seen snow once, as they were from Israel. After another word of thanks they left and I curled up. I don’t know if I fell asleep or if I had just started to doze off or what. All I know is that I definitely started to shiver and was being blasted by rain and heavier winds.

Falling asleep this time was easy.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

The Parthenon, The First Rule, and The Gyro

1/20

Breakfast time rolled around. You want to know what I ate? Yogurt with honey. Our first morning was dedicated to the acropolis. We were going to get up early but our late night up top of the hotel made Greg change the time until later. The journey up was pretty short as our hotel was so close. Today it became extremely clear that there was a huge graffiti problem. Everywhere there was something on the walls, buildings, and every other flat surface. You couldn't walk ten feet without running into something sprayed. We followed a road up that was paved on the right and had stone on the left. The stone was the original road. It was tiny. Maybe enough room for three people abreast. The closer we got the larger the Parthenon grew and the larger the city seemed to become as we gained a better vantage point of the city. Walking up to the first building we were greeted by the noise of a jackhammer. These guys were taking apart some concrete reinforced with rebar. No idea what it was, but it was disconcerting to have people destroying something right next to the ancient building. It was pretty impressive with all the marble pillars. Walking through this building we were greeted by the view of the Parthenon...with scaffolding.

Apparently for the last 12 years or so they have been trying to restore the building to its past grandeur. Even with all the pipes and men working it was a sight to see. There was another building, the one I could see from my hotel room, but I never heard its name either. The backside of it was closest to the Parthenon had four statues as pillars. They were women in long dresses with a cylinder something sitting on there heads. All along the edge of the acropolis stood a tall wall. The wall was at least forty feet tall. Four feet of that wall went up to make sure we didn’t fall off the edge of the acropolis. The view was spectacular. It felt like we could see almost everything - city sprawl as the buildings climbed up the hillsides and even the compact buildings down by our hotel. It was neat that we could pick out our hotel. Made me found of the view we had once again. We went down to the theater of H something...which was impressive in itself. This theater would've had a spectacular view if it wasn't for the columns and structure that served as the changing area for the actors. I actually found a postcard where the theater was in use, but it wasn’t open for us to walk to. We kept going until we hit the theater of Dionysus. This one was smaller but was great because we could walk amount the seating. We weren't allowed into the orchestra spot, the half circle that was left open at the bottom level, probably in an attempt to help protect the sculptures in the front stage area carved into this short wall that served as the back of the orchestra. We passed ruins and more ruins on our way down hill.
We eventually turned around and headed back up. Our group accidentally split, a huge portion heading to the right and another small group with me headed to the left. My small group went to the Roman agora. The Roman’s had built it in an effort to try to get everyone to shop there instead of the old agora that had been used for centuries. The ground was mostly dirt now but it used to be completely lined with stone. A few pieces could be seen, conveying what an impressive sight it would be to see completely covered in marble. There were only a few columns that had been put back up on one side. The rest were in ruins. A few statues, and the two big column and triangular topped entrance buildings stood as well.

My group came back to the hotel. I thought everyone was going to keep on going to the temple of Zeus as several people had stated an interest in going. Boy, was I ever wrong. I asked the group if anyone wanted to keep going or at lest get food. Carianna was the only one to respond back an. Saying she would be willing to get food in a little bit. I asked her how long a little bit was. I loved that she was honest with me - she said a few hours. Its better to have information than to have no idea what is going on.

I can't pretend that I was a little annoyed. I was starting to really hate rule number one - don't go off alone anywhere. It makes sense, but I still feel like I am an adult. When it comes to ethical choices what should we choose: Free will or safety? What did Greg value the most? Safety. When it comes to ethics I think that Greg had the right decision. I love being able to go do what I want and when I want, especially when people are just vegging out, but this freedom is obviously a bit crucial to make people happy and the trip enjoyable. Had I been able to go off by myself I would've been able to have a better cultural experience. But what is happiness, and freedom, if you can't live to have it? Its not highly likely that I would get seriously injured, die or get kidnapped - but what is that risk worth? Greg’s rule insures one thing, that we don't get it trouble and that our safety is not endangered. If we are endangered in some way, at least we have someone to help us out when we are with a buddy. Revoking that freedom I have for the value of safety, in this instance, is ethical. I would rather have a short-term unhappiness than a long-term expense or consequence. (Does death count as long term?) I could totally see myself being hit by a moped in thon the sidewalk if I was by myself and going to the hospital would've been fun. I would’ve hated to have to call the hotel to pass on a message to Greg.

A car in Greece actually hit my aunt when she was younger. Now you can see why I am a bit weary of the cars and even the bus divers. I definitively understand why it is Greek law to be buckled up in buses.

One classmate arrived while I was sitting in the lobby reading my book in an attempt to distract myself from the desire to just run out because of my annoyance. I picked this spot so that I could go out with the first classmate heading out of the hotel. I waited downstairs for them to get some more money from their room. Then we went and wondered up to our meeting place for tours, which was next to a post office and looked at a sandwich shop that Greg had suggested. Almost got one, but then we decided to keep moving because it was a bit crazy in there. I know I wasn’t sure how I was going to order and the chaos of it all didn’t really make me want to blunder my way through. I had been starving when we first got to the hotel but it seemed my digestive system was shutting down since I hadn't fed it. We almost bought oranges from this little fruit cart in a little square but you had to buy it by the kilo. As good as I hear the oranges are, I didn't want 2.2 pounds of fruit. We wondered down the flea market that started right at the corner of the square. There were lots of places with clothes, Greek pottery and the other touristy shops. There were also shops dedicated just to backgammon boards that doubled as chessboards. I really liked them. I am still trying to decide if I want to get one. As we made our way back to the hotel I found a gift for my sister but she will have to wait to find out what that is.

Once at the hotel and I took my spot on the couch again, waiting once more for the next person on their way out. I joined Professor Johnson on his trip to get a gyro (euro). The best food in Greece is the gyro. I don't know what it is about them that makes them so good but...ok I lied. I do. I loved the hot pita bread. America 's pita bread is too thick and tough. These things here are soft, pliable, and oh so pleasantly hot. The pork and tzatziki sauce coupled nicely with the slices of tomato. The pork juice, tomato, and melted tzatziki drip just a bit at the bottom of the pita and the tzatziki tends to get stuck to one side so you have to bite one side in a large clump. Other than that, perfect. We passed a group on their way back. Everyone had a gyro. We told everyone we would meet them back on top of the hotel. After ordering we realized that we had started at the wrong end of the Gyro line. The guy gave us our orders and then told us to go pay. The man at the cash register was annoyed with the guy who served us and said something in Greek. It was only then that we noticed people giving their receipts to the guy serving food. Felt slightly guilty about making a stupid American mistake that showed a lack of culture awareness. The day was beautiful on top of the hotel. The acropolis was just as neat looking in the day as the night, but I felt like it was more majestic in the night. I wonder what it used to look like when it was lit up by fires instead of large floodlights. I ended up doing some of my reading in the sun. Eventually smoke from people and the cooling day drove me back below to my room to type. We met up for dinner and headed off to some place that Greg had gone before. Don't remember the name at all, I ordered the night’s special of chicken in wine sauce. The chicken was nothing spectacular, but it was good. It had a great golden brown color and the skin was the perfect mix of crisp and moist. I actually pulled the leg off when I was trying to just get the drumstick. The meat was tender and moist. The rice that came along with my dish was flavored - I think it was cooked with tomatoes, mushroom, and bell pepper. Not really sure what else. It also had a fair share of grease at the bottom of it. Maybe it had some sort of meat too it as well. All I know is that I enjoyed it a lot. We gathered once again on the rooftop. It wasn't until the smoke from all the cigars started to be blown my way that I left my beautiful view.

Flying to the best view ever - with the best food ever.

1/19/10


Today we flew to Athens. I had a bit of a scare along the way. I thought I had everything, but really I somehow left my Bose headphone case at the Starbucks we went to. With my iPod. With tickets. With my passport. Just a slight scare, it was there though so no worries. What was scary was the price we paid at Starbucks. I spend the equivalent of five bucks on a caramel cream frappachino. I can't lie…it was wonderful. Tasted just like a caramel milkshake with a bit of ice. I have been avoiding any meal or place that screams American until this point. I caved when I tasted Carianna's. I managed to finish the last of Trials during that time.

There were also beautiful clouds that distracted me from my book. THEY'RE SO FLUFFY I COULD DIE! The sunset added a beautiful touch, although I was on the moon side of the plane so I took a few pictures. Driving into Athens was an experience in itself. People are crazy drivers here in Greece! The bus would come within inches (or just one) of hitting cars, trees, and other objects near the road. Of course there was also the view of Athens. It was an endless sprawl of buildings in every direction.

We were dropped off in the main square of Athens, the one where everyone riots and protests when there are problems. Great location right? Actually, it is. We followed a road down to the Hotel Plaka. I have been in an elevator three times this trip. My room is on the 3rd floor. The catch is that there is a mezzanine before the first floor, so I was really on the fourth. Will and I carried our bags up to the room. It was larger than our last two, with the exception of the bathroom, which was pretty small. They definitely managed to compact everything. The toilet has a flush where you pull up on this knob on top and then push down when you want it to stop flushing. We had a balcony so we rushed out there. We could see the acropolis and one of the buildings on top - not the Parthenon. We then decided to go on the roof. As you have seen two posts ago, amazing view! This view alone is worth the expense of this wonderful trip.

We met in the lobby to go to dinner. I can't even type the name of the place because of the symbols. It was something like Tuo Yappa (with the Y having three prongs on top and the last a had an accent). Oh my goodness was the food amazing! We started out with a Greek salad - tomatoes, red onion, bell pepper, capers, and olives. I feel like I am missing something...oh yeah! It had a block of feta cheese on top! The flavors combined nicely but the olives and capers were way to strong for me. I am glad I only took a small piece of an olive instead of the whole thing. Made that mistake with two capers at once. Complete salt blast. We next had tzatziki sauce, a kind of spiced yogurt sauce. We dipped fried zucchini into it and bread. There was also herb butter. Of course I was sold the second I heard butter, but the herbs added a nice touch to the flavor. After that came saganaki - fried cheese. I use to do this as a kid. I would heat up a frying pan and cook little pieces of cheese. Greasy…yes. Delicious…even more so. Same thing with the Saganaki, only this was a small block of cheese and covered in lemon juice. We loved it so much each table made another order on top of the two we had already had. We also got some green weed. Ok it wasn't a weed, but this plan reminded me of seaweed because of its look. We covered it in lemon juice and olive oil. I ordered Ambelourgou Lamb. They basically take a lamb steak and stuff the center with garlic and some sort of cheese. It was so good, but it definitely had the strongest lamb flavor I have yet had in my life. Something about it makes me not want to eat it while another part of me wants to keep munching away. I wonder if I am having a subconscious problem with eating a baby sheep.... The last thing we had for desert was yogurt with honey and walnut pieces. This may have been a highlight. Not because it was the best dish but because Greg said that it would be served at breakfast everywhere. The yogurt is thick, closer to sour cream in consistency. It fluffs (FLUFFY!) up when you mix the honey in.

Returning to the hotel we all gathered at the top of the hotel. It was amazing to spend all my time typing up there - look up and there the Parthenon was on the acropolis. This is what we had for our view. I can get over how amazing it is and how lucking we are to have this hotel. Every chance I get, I am going to come up there to type.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Grey Zones, Leaving My Mark, and Dog Smell is Universal

If you missed the last post please scroll down - I have an epic picture for you!

1/18/10

Shower. Best thing to start the day. The bathroom has a tub you have to climb into just to shower. Life would've been fun if I had slipped and fallen. I did a quick run to the bank with Will. I ended up getting change for a five, two Euros and a one. The woman at the desk handed me what looked like a hotel card with a magnetic strip and directed me to an automatic machine. I inserted the card and the machine spat out my coins one at a time. I wanted the woman just to hand me money, but it actually makes sense to use the machine. The tellers no longer have large amounts of money as it is all locked away behind a giant machine.

The whole group did a laundry run. I struggled through some of the trials and actually left my mark on at the laundry mat - permanent mark. My jeans have a metal piece on the back right pocket. It is actually kind of neat as it has a carving that can either be taken as a rabbit or a whale. The problem is that it is on the left side of my pocket...directly where I sit. Most of the time it doesn't bug me but sometimes it kind of stabs. This time I was lounging on the wooden bench in the laundry mat. I slid my legs forward so that I lounge even more. I slid too far down so I sat back up and slid down again. I heard an odd noise through my headphones this time. I took my headphones off. Eventually I was too far and so I repeated the process, this time clearly hearing the grating sound that was now coming from under me. I looked under my...butt...where I located three huge gouges marks along the bench. I felt bad that I had been the first one to really scrape up the bench. I tried just to sit normally. Took a lot of effort. Clearly I have been spending too much of my time lying on floors with only my head leaning against the wall. I have a horrible feeling that my posture is going to give me a beating as I try to sit in chair properly at school.

There was this dog in the building. He, I am guessing, was happy, wonderful, and loved to be petted. When he left it was oddly comforting to realize that he smelled the same as all other dogs. Nothing like the good old universal dog smell.

Walking back there was a car crash. A taxi was driving crazy and a porch was backing up. The taxi honked and swerved left but the pourche didn’t stop. It slammed its back left corner into the taxi's side. It made such a huge noise for so little damage though.

We gathered later to go out. The girls split from us the second they found a woman's H&M leaving us guys to wonder. We went to H&M, a sports shop, LEGO, several tourist shops, and a few other random places. We heard Under the Sea played by a Jamaican looking guy on a marimba.

In class we started talking about Grey Zones of ethics. It is sort of like virtues becoming vices. The difference is that your ethics may force you to do something less ethical, leaving you with less faith in the ethics that you had. There is one situation I have had to face a lot in Germany - the homeless or crippled. People would walk around, with their leg bent in at a 30-degree angle or unable to move around more than three feet in the air because they couldn't support themselves higher. Some were less handicapped. The double bind is do you help? This may seem like a stupid question. Of course my heart screams yes but my head wonders if I should. By giving to these people so that they can survive I wonder if the money will be used for things I don't support and that will not help their survival - often cigarettes or alcohol. I have had this happened in Canada. I went running early one morning before my choir was going to perform at All North West in Vancouver BC. I ran into a guy who asked for money as he sat in the doorway of a 7/11. I told him no but I would get him something to eat. He said no. I asked if he was sure. He changed his mind and asked for a few candy bars. I got him a sandwich. Did he start eating it? Yes. Was it what he would've spent his money on? No. When placed in a situation where you don't know if the person is going to spend the money the way you want it to be spent it is better to just get them what they need (to survive), fulfilling your desire to improve their life. Kant would argue that I am wrong, as no matter what my intentions were they are led by good will, making my actions good within themselves. I would argue that he has made the actions good, but that does not deny the fact that my good actions can produce bad results. This is the problem of that Grey Zone. I have given money to several people, but when there is doubt I have trouble acting. I don't want the bad results - even if my actions are good. I can't completely trust that my actions won't lead to bad things. I can only hope that what I do can make a difference for these people.

The first time I had this concept of a grey zone was actually in an RPG (roll playing game). You act as a character in the game and the actions that you choose creates how good or bad you character becomes. A beggar comes to you asking for money. You can either give him money or call him scum and scare him off. If you give him money he goes off to buy food. Realizing he has money other beggars beat him to death to steal the money, as they are so desperate. When you choose to meanly scare him off he doesn't attract the attention that causes his death. Knowing what happens in both choices, I actually decided to scare him off, making my character more "evil." My actions were bad, but the results were harmless compared to an act of compassion that causes death. Funny how random things stick with you and influence your life. I assume the world isn't that bad that the people I give a coin to won't get mugged. It just makes me a little aware that we don't know the consequence of our good actions sometimes.


We had dinner at the same cafe that we first went to. Its name is Schuarzes cafe...or something like that. I once again ordered milk, to the laughter of me classmates, and a Germany style noodle dish. It was the same poufy noodles as last time, but there was a completely different sauce. Can't really explain it. It was a wonderful night though because the place gave us water!

Clean room. Pack. Shower.

We had a mini party downstairs in one of the kid’s rooms. People were smoking cigars on the balcony with the door mostly shut but we could smell it from outside the room. I stayed for a bit but eventually the smoke drove me away. I typed for an hour in my bed. With Will not back I decided I should just pass out.

The Holocaust Tower, Fight Reason to Love, and the Best View Ever

Ok, ok, I admit that I write in the first person even when its not "today" - I have been falling behind in my writing. The real today (1/19) though needs a comment as I write this. We have arrived at the Hotel Plaka (I think that is the spelling). Poking my head out of my bedroom window I had a view of the Acropolis. Upstairs, on the 7th floor (really the 8th) I had the best view ever. I plan on doing all my typing every night to this view. I will now return to my present tense of the past



1/17/10

Apparently going to bed early last night didn't help Will much, as I woke him five times during the night...walking to the bus I past the store Butler, a cooking store. I have seen it both in England, Germany and Greece (slight time slip). I really want to go in one sometime. The bus ride was painless, taking us close to the Jewish museum. This was an unexpected experience. When I first got in the exhibit I was actually really confused. I guess I was expecting the force and power of the concentration camp for some reasons. The first thing I was reading was about a successful family business. Didn't get the point. I actually got board and moved away from the family story. I ended up reading on a computer, mainly about stereotypes of Jews and where they came from but a little section on Albert Einstein. He is culturally Jewish but not religiously - despite this fact he was asked to be the first president of Israel. The rich money lending stereotype actually comes because the fact that Christians controlled many of the work guilds in Europe and refused entrance to the Jews. They turned to money lending because it was one of the few things they could do. Ironically, the Christians borrowed from the grudgingly because the economy needed money lending - also Christians weren't allowed to lend money for profit.

The building was interestingly designed. Hallways were slanted and a slight gradient. I was walking up this one hallway reading stories about objects, each attached to a single person. Eventually I ran into a toy figure, white made with carved wood. It belonged to a woman who owned the figure when she was younger. She was sent away to a concentration camp. She survived but was having a hard time. It was this figure, which she found again, that gave her strength to keep going. It is amazing how we can find something or someone in our lives that can hold great meaning and give us the power or inspiration to do something. What is crazy is that often these objects are nothing amazing, they are often commonplace objects. (sorry, lots my train of thought. We are playing "Bad Romance" and have a great view of the Acropolis) If we look at Mill and pleasure, the pleasure gained from high facilities is more worthwhile than ones based on lower, physical, facilities. An object that is so commonplace but brings such happiness and pleasure clearly must lean to the higher facilities, bringing the strongest of pleasures. Nietzsche argues that pleasure is all about sensations of power. You could argue two different sides about the toy figure. At first I was thinking that Nietzsche was completely wrong. These are commonplace objects. They are not objects of power such as a gun or gold. Looking up at the Parthenon, I realized that I was wrong. Not every object must be considered universally powerful to be filled with power to an individual. These objects of attachment can empower people far beyond anything we would normally consider empowering, bringing the greatest pleasure to the people who find them. That said, these types of items can also bring great sadness of horrible memories or painful thoughts of happier times. Not exactly empowering. The hope that these items can bring though is great.

After reading about the toy figure I actually went into the Holocaust tower alone. The tower was freezing. It was a triangular cement room with giant walls. There was a single slit at the top corner, shedding light down. A ladder was just out of reach. I could understand the connection to a concentration camp where you were so close to getting out and yet not. There were cracks and holes in the walls, hinting at the possible chance to get out but no real hope as you looked at the rest of the concrete. The door that I had entered in from was thick, heavy, and difficult to open. It gave the feeling of closing you in. I wasn't in the tower for a terribly long time, but I was starting to freeze: soul, mind and body. Voices and noise of the city was there, providing a surreal feeling of being locked away with no hope. Yet I suffered nothing. Nothing compared to the horrible conditions people - estranged from society - had to live through or died as a result of. I can't imagine the difficulty that these people went through.

Another empty room held what the architect called "voids." These huge empty spaces, like the tower, resonated the strongest feelings with me. One of them was huge and tall. On the ground lay 10,000 faces cut out of metal. The faces stood for the people who had to live and die with all the suffering.

Leaving the museum after two hours we went towards Checkpoint Charlie. It was interesting to see where the divide had been between Berlin. There was a great sandwich shop near there. Absolutely wonderful. I guess I am not really use to salami, or whatever it was, being in a sandwich with hardboiled egg, cheese, cucumber, lettuce and tomato slices. It was definitely a good experience. I also got some random doughnut thing. That tasted like peach, possibly apricot, and had an entire side dipped of chocolate.

We went to the Berlin wall as well. We actually saw where it used to be in the ground, as they filled it with bricks and the wall would swerve into the middle of the road. One wall. That is all it took to separate a whole city and political sphere. I pray we never divide our nation by our politics. Or have we already? Right next to the wall was the site of the Gestapo Headquarters. Destroyed, only a few remains from the structure exist below ground level. Today stands a museum, the Typography of Terror. There were a lot of stories about the Nazi's and the SS and how they came to power. I listened to a speech where one of the Nazi leaders, Heinrich Himmler, gave a speech on the elite SS's values: Only the dead enemy can't hurt you. Lead by example, both body and soul. Blind obedience with unconditional discipline. Comradeship not understood by others outside of the rank. Loyalty that will survive every difficulty and issue. Never dishonor your reputation, the reputation of the SS, or of your mother company. You can easily see how the Nazi's misused ethics. Roth talks about this and how it has destroyed the trust in the world. How can you trust ethics, which you thought were pure and good, when they can be used for horrible means? I guess we have to used ethics as a tool and must really consider how they are used. Really it is more of a question of when do our virtues become vices and knowing the fine line. For example, love can become controlling and abusive, loyalty can become blind obedience, and justice can become revenge. By being aware that our virtues and ethics can be swayed to misuse. That said, people in the SS should've realized that something was wrong when they were asked to have blind obedience. Being blind never leads anywhere when you must make decisions in war.

We eat dinner at the hotel restaurant, where we were suppose to get 10% off...but we forgot to tell them that we were staying at the hotel. I had stuffed guinea fowl. The stuffing was some sort of bacon, which sort of distracted from the chicken like bird. It was also served with a salad and some potatoes soaked in butter and then covered in cheese, which has been melted until it was crisp on the top. Surprising as it is, I was actually not a fan of these potatoes. They lacked the soft moistness that made other buttered potatoes delicious. The cheese didn't really add that much to the dish either.

Our entire group when out to a bar - the Beastro 2000. I ordered a glass of water. My mistake. I thought I ordered water. Instead I got a still water with a lemon. There went $3. The night was spent visiting, watching a football game, and chatting about life. My favorite subject was love. One person was talking about how it was pointless to start a relationship, or continue one, when they didn't know where the relationship would be going in the next few months or even year. We started getting into the discussion of what it means to be in a relationship. Or more accurately I was eavesdropping. I heard about baggage with relationships, being in different places within our lives, and in the words of Greg, a generation of people unwilling to let relationships flow - we must know where they are going and control them. After hearing lots of reasons why not to go for the relationship and the last comment I had to speak up. Our problem with relationships is that we don't want to take risks - risk with love, risk with our futures, and risk with time. We would rather spend our time in the security of not being in a relationship as we avoid conflict and emotional strife. We value stability, which is safe and allows for happiness. Kant talks about how reason decreases happiness. In this instance Kant is right, as our reason can drive us away from relationships. What we forget is that relationships in themselves are good. Kant talks about how the only thing that is good is good will, as good will is good in itself and is not a means to any end. We forget to bring good will to our relationships. We are selfish and just think about ourselves and the relationships as means to an end. What we need to understand is that relationships in themselves are meaningful. When it comes to relationships what we need to do is to stick through them. Too often we jump away from relationships because of signs that they may end some time in the distant future, instead of when they actually need to end. By sticking through relationships until the definite end date we get the most of them. Now I don't mean this in the selfish "get" way. By staying in a relationship you are forced to work through difficulties, hard times, and person flaws. You develop the ability to work through relationships after the whole honeymoon phase when you may be blinded by love. If you only have short relationships then you will never develop that skill. If you don't, when you find that person you really wish to be with for the rest of your life you may lose them just because of your inability to make the relationship work through thick or thin. Because of this workability factor, sticking with a relationship a long as possible is useful for your future and never a waste of time, even if the relationship does end in the future. If you don't have a solid reason to leave then it is pointless to do so. The excuse that you know you don't want to be in the same place later in life is flimsy at best - especially when you aren't at the peak of your relationships - lets say five, ten, or twenty years. Relationships never really stop growing. When we are only a year, or way less, into a relationship we don't know everything about the relationship that will never stop growing. A person may find that they are willing to make sacrifices for their partner (oh how p.c.) or the relationship later in the relationship - sacrifices that are unimaginable so early in a relationship. If we don't stick with relationships how will we know if they are worth sticking with in the end? You may find that a relationship you didn't think would last forever turns into something more amazing than you ever thought it could. The last part is baggage and personal flaws. We all have them. If you can figure out how to work with what you will always bring to a relationship then you will be able to go into any relationship and make them most of it by minimizing problems caused by the baggage and personal flaws. It also helps you to be ready to deal with other people's flaws or mini OCD moments.

I was offered some beer several times this night. I just told them my decision not to drink at all this trip. We all have our reasons for our actions. So do I.

Bed calls as it is 2 am and I only did a rough draft of this blog : )



Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Um...possible internet trouble?

We are leaving for Greece today and I don't know if there will be internet anywhere we are staying. If there isn't, I will be back in the US on the 1st of February - and sleeping until the 2nd. I will probably post my journal entries then.

Thanks everyone for reading and I will try to post stuff when I can.

60 degree weather with sun, here I come!

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Free the giant Tiger, Hide among the towers, and tell the UC that they need some Udders

1/16/10

Today our journey took us to Museum Island. What's that you ask? An island. With museums. I know kind of a let down with the plot. Kind of like Snakes on a Plane or Cowboys VS Aliens, it's all in the name. Of course there was a lot in these buildings that wasn't in the name. A lot of the museums themselves were works of art and had beautiful interiors and exteriors. The first museum we went in, the Neues Museum, contained Egyptian coffins, artifacts, and huge pieces of hieroglyphics with pictures that must have been taken from some building. I past statues, carvings of hippos, glass cups and bowls made hundreds of years ago. One carving stood out. Once again it was the man killing the bull with the dog trying to eat the bull, the scorpion/crab going after the testicles, and some snake doing something. Trying to google it didn't really come up with any results, but hey can you blame if for that description. Definitely had some interesting sites pop up. Everything from books, blogs, to quotes from how I met your mother.

Outside of the museum I took pictures of statues, two on horses (your welcome Hannah) and one of an archer. Outside our museum a brass trio (tuba, french horn, and trombone) played Hall of the Mountain King while dressed in colonial looking clothing. We crossed the river and walked down the side to get to another museum. We had to cross through this a market that had two stands selling brats. We may or may not have vowed to go back to them. We also passed a guy playing wine glasses like a piano. It was pretty legit. I almost wanted to buy a cd. I resisted the urge.

What I forgot to mention was that I did not remember to charge my camera. Part way through the first museum I had already had to revert to the hot battery trick. When your battery is almost dead, you pop it out of the camera and hold it for awhile. By heating up the battery you allow for the energy to be better used, making what little power you have left go farther, even making an apparently dead battery work. I always put this concept into use with my gameboy as a kid. I used this trick for most of the morning getting sixty photos out of a "dead" battery. Eventually I used all the power up.

The next museum, the Pergamonmuseum (it was written all together) was amazing. You walk in and the entire gigantic first room is a reproduction of what some temple remains would look like - to scale. All around the walls were these beautiful sculptures, mostly in ruins, lined all the way around the room. In from of us stood a set of huge marble stairs leading up to pillars and a ceiling topped with a few small sculptures. The large ones that were suppose to be up there were displayed on the ground, horses, lions, and some other animal I forgot. The scene around the outer wall though contained all the Greek gods and important mythical beings in various states of wear. It was amazing. This was not the only life-sized replica to be held here. There was also a reconstruction of the Ishtar Gate of Babylon with the tower parapets as well (47 feet tall). These huge structures, the gate reconstruction is actually two gates and the second one wasn't put up, are insane and begs an ethical question - when should you take something and when should you leave it?

When we talked about the British Museum we went over this topic a little. The museums claim that they are protecting a part of history, and they are, and because of this it gives them the complete right to hold on to what they are protecting, despite the fact that it came from somewhere else. Countries have demanded the return of the artifacts that belong back in the countries the objects originated in. The Museums claim that their actions are done in pursuit of the greater good for everyone (Mill). They have a greater ability to protect the artifacts than the home countries often do, making sure that these artifacts will be around for centuries to come for all the people of the world. If we use the Vail of Ignorance, Rawls, then we realize that this is not the best solution. No matter where the artifacts are stored, people will be content as long as they have access to them. The home country will never be happy unless they can get their artifact back. By giving the artifacts back, when there are facilities to take them back safely, then everyone is more appeased, except the museums that have no true right to the artifacts - but the museums might profit from the sale back to the countries making every position a good one to be in, either as a person who wants to see the artifacts, the museum, or the country that the objects belongs to.

I don't have an issue with smaller objects being protected and held in museums. The problem I do have is when the objects are HUGE! Of course the Ishtar gate was a replica, but I don't know about the Greek temple or the roman looking column supported structure. These things were massive and looked like they had to be torn apart, moved, and reconstructed. When complete and not in a horrible state of ruins (ok the Greek structure may have been) then I believe that it isn't right to take the structure away from where it is. I feel that the value, and possibly the structure, is put at risk. Museums are kind of like zoos in a way to me when it comes to something that has its own grandness to it. It may be amazing to see a tiger in a zoo, but seeing a tiger out in the jungle would be even more amazing. If the tiger could live there, reproduce, and live a good life - then that is where it should be. I feel the same about large structures.

Huge pieces of Egyptian wall with hieroglyphics had been taken and held in the Pergamonmuseum. Was it good looking? Yes. Should it be there? I don't feel that it should be necessarily. I feel it would be more impressive out there where it first was. Of course the huge pieces of wall were either already broken, or had to be broken to be brought to the UK. Touring Egyptian ruins right where they were found would be great. When the greater good will be served by protecting the object and taking it, that line of thought should be followed. If it is a complete and intact structure, it should be left and chunks shouldn't have been taken. Maybe ethics of archeology has changed...or have been established.

The grandness of the Greek temple though was striking, and it wasn't even complete. When thinking about the greater good of the world and what is best for everyone, it is easy to see why the temple was built. Greeks believed that temples in the name of their patron god would help secure the happiness of their god. It may be expensive and resource intensive to build, but the happiness of the god would mean the prosperity of their city-state - making sure that it flourished. When displeased a god might incur their wrath upon the town. Establishing a temple benefited everyone as it kept the gods from getting angry and brought blessings to everyone, bringing good to everyone and minimizing pain (Mill).                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                

On our way to the next museum, the Bode, we got a bratwurst. There was not bun but a more stout rectangular bread bun that was used to clamp onto the brat. The nice thing was that it was cheap. The ketchup and mustard dispensers were actually hanging bags with an udder. Yes an udder. Squeeze it and the sauce starts to spray out in a very thin controllable stream. MOST functional thing ever! No more wasted dressings! So I realized I said sauce before. England offered you sauce with everything. Brown sauce, incase you ever get asked, is actually made of figs - or at least part fig. The ketchup I got was actually more of a barbecue sauce! Slightly smoky and full of flavor!

Lunch was amazing. Yes we ate twice. I felt like I was starving though. I had a Germany noodle dish, (Spaezle I think), and a sprite. I broke down. It was the first pop on the trip. I like soda every now and then, but my past as a runner usually keeps me away. Our waiter wouldn't give us tap water, the usually roll their eyes when you ask, and I didn't want to pay two or three Euros for some mineral water I wouldn't like. The noodle dish was great, as the noodles were big and pouffy and then they were mixed in something like a cream sauce with bell peppers, cheese and something...think noodle omelet! I felt super hunger and thirsty, but I couldn't finish more than half the dish. I don't know why...but the dish was great. Maybe I was just dying for some water and I couldn't tell...

We went to the Brandenberg gate! It was neat to look at. When we were going to go under it I was trying to decide which path I would go under it. I was going to go through the center but instead went through the one on its right. There was an archer sculpture high up above on the wall. Of course I was going under that one!

We walked around a lot and ended up next to a holocaust Jewish memorial site. It was a huge piece of abstract art. It covered at least a city block. At the very edge, rectangular cement blocks (I just realized that they were the size of coffins) started rising out of the ground in a perfect grid. Each block was somewhere between three inches to six and they grew the farther and farther out they went. I just started to walk into the mass to go off by myself. The ground slowly dropped down and then started to form waves with little hills here and there. As the ground sloped downwards the blocks continued to rise and rise. I wondered in and then started to zig zag towards the center. At a low point, I just stopped. It was eerily quiet, with most the sound blocked off. The cement blocks, now towers, reached over ten feet above my head. I feel separated from people and humanity in a way. Here I stood, alone, and I wondered if I would ever be found. I knew I could make my way out in the end, but finding another person seemed like it would be difficult. I quickly went zig zagging back towards the west (I think it west ward direction). I stopped again and was sort of surprised when a woman and some man went by. They were only visible for a second before they were gone. It was just as empty and lonely as before. I could understand why this was a memorial. If you came in here with the concept of it being a memorial you could connect and start pulling your ideas of what the artist was trying to convey. Without that, this site had great potential for a playground. Adults were jumping on top of them and taking pictures. I felt like they were being disrespectful, and then I realized that I hadn't seen any marker that said what this place was. I only knew it was a memorial site because our professor told us. I must admit, playing any version of tag, nerf guns, or any game in that nature would've been crazy fun in there.

Dinner really wasn't dinner as everyone was still full. We instead ended up at "the house of 100 beers", of course it was in German but we got the point. Most people ordered a drink while Megan and I split an ice cream dish. It was basically Neapolitan with cream on top and a hot container of fruit ready to be poured on top. The ice cream was smooth and a bit rich but the fruit was what made it perfect in my mind. I wasn't sure what one of the berries was. Kind of looked like a blueberry without a skin. Whitish. It was a perfect way to end the night food wise. The rest of my night turned to typing. I went to bed late again to let Will sleep.

Confessions

1/15/11

Today was not the best of days. I was edgy and not really looking forward to a day full of unknowns. Sleeping for only three and a half hours will do that to you. With my metabolism running behind eating my yogurt with granola left me feeling sicker to my stomach than anything. It was peach. I love peach yogurt and I couldn't fully enjoy it. FML. With Will I ran over to the market to get some back up food for the day, not knowing what the food situation would be. I bought another thing of fruit yogurt, haven't eaten the first yet, and another Kase cheese roll. I really love all the cobble stone walkways and roads that are everywhere. They add to the beauty of the world I feel. Today we traveled by train to get to a concentration camp, first the wrong way and then back. I am realizing now how amazing the tube system is. Here you have to buy tickets, which can be used whenever, but then you have to validate them. Doing so stamps them with the time that they are no longer useful. We stopped at one station and had to wait for another train. My boss Allison Stephens had been on this trip before, and told me that I should get pretzels whenever I could. Spotting a stand I decided to get one. It was called Kase Brezel, or maybe that was the pretzel. It was covered in cheese and absolutely delicious. On the second train I ended up sleeping most of the way. Truth be told, I started out with reading and then stopped as I started to fall asleep. Nothing like The Trials and Death of Socrates to put you out of this world.

We walked to the concentration camp that is now the Memorial and Museum of Sachsenhausen operated. Sachsenhausen was one of the first concentration camps, the one where all others were to be modeled after. We were given audio guides that looked like a giant magnifying glass that you just put to your ear and away we went. I saw Gillian standing by a metal model of the camp listening to a real tour guide. I went and stood next to her while the person finished. After a quick hello she said goodbye and went on her tour, which lasted four hours, we were given two and a half to do our own self guided tours. Walking into the camp on a road along the fence was slightly creepy. Every step I had the though about how someone had to walk this path, knowing that they were being locked away but not knowing the horribleness of all to come. I went through the main gate, the roll-call area, the reconstruction of two barracks, a prison, the kitchen, to a monument to the beating down of fascism. There was the execution trench where they shot and hung people, burial grounds with ashes, and then there was the site of the crematory. After that there was the industrial work yard where people made boots or cut wood, the infirmary barracks that had been extended to hold more of the sick (not an act of good will but an investment to keep the needed slave labor) and the pathology building with its cellar mortuary, a location for human experiments, bisections, and storing the dead that were originally burned off site. All around was the walls, the towers, and a constant reminder of darkness.

One of the most interesting stories was about a string quartet that practiced in the mortuary every night. I have no idea how they even managed to get the instruments in - especially the cello. Looking at the ethics of it all they risked everything to practice an instrument, for what, a little big of beauty. They put their lives on the line for something greater, happiness. Aristotle believes that people aim for happiness as the single end that we pursue. In terms of greater good, at first the players were putting themselves at risk but in the end, as they never got caught, they were able to bring their happiness from their playing back to the people. The players somehow managed to start giving concerts for the other prisoners. By putting their lives a secondary value, they placed the group as a whole as the priority and brought them happiness. Mill would say they did the greater good by making that decision as they stopped pain by helping the people forget about the horribleness of their lives and brought a bright beauty into a dark world where there was almost no light of happiness.

I must confess, when being at the camp the most impactful thing to me was not the buildings, the artifacts, or even the personal stories being told. It was the dirt. My hiking shoes are tough and have a good sole. Each step I took I left an imprint digging into the mud, pushing the gravely dirt, or displacing a rock. I had it easy, so easy, compared to all the thousands of people who walked here enslaved. This was dirt that had robbed bodies of heat, absorbed the sweat and blood, and had given way to the feet of less well shod men and women. This was a dirt where you could feel the pain, the turmoil, and the lack of hope. It was a grime that I could feel, grime that people imprisoned here carried with them, the embodiment of a past time with no escape. This dirt holds all the crimes against the imprisoned and will forever be imprisoned there. I value life and its quality, causing my ethics call for me to act to improve life. What could I do to act? Nothing. All I could do was walk around, take in the sights and learn more about what happened. It was depressing. I was helpless to act on my ethics, to help someone, to reach out and be the support someone needs. Instead my feet became weary and my back started to feel the strain from carrying a backpack around and I was reminded that what I faced now was nothing compared to what these people had to face. How about their ethics? Were they able to keep up a positive force for the quality of life? Would I be able to? When we are forced to the bottom of our Maslow's Hierarchy of needs we are forced down to a less intellectual pursuit, survival. Would I lose most of them when everyday my life and others were placed in danger because my needs were never being fulfilled? All I know is that I would like to say I would, but we have no idea how far our ethics will bend to make a choice that will allow us to live to make another decision. All I can hope is that I never have to be placed in that type of situation where I must choose my own life or my ethics. I personally would like to keep both.

I didn't really speak much to anyone while at the camp. It didn't feel right somehow.

I used the way back to get out of that mindset, as I knew I would be thinking about it again for this blog. I listened to my iPod and played Sudoku, managing to beat a medium round and set a new best time. Back at the hotel we had a short break - typing - and then class. Today we talked about Kant and Hume. Our group's biggest question, we gave our opinions and didn't know what our professor was looking for when asking questions. Its hard, being in a class where you don't have a solid grounding in the language, dang, its hard being in a country where you don't understand the language. We finally got where we were suppose to go in the end. Just took us forever. Its hard replicating the words of another person when you aren't sure that your translation you have made is correct.

The unknowns were finally made clear when I had a conversation with Greg. I won't talk about the discussion exactly but I will talk about my moral standings on drinking instead.

I don't drink. Check. Got that out of the way. Do I hold it against those that do? No, not really. You see, my problem with drinking has always been about the behavior and the legality of it. We aren't suppose to drink until we are 21 in the hope that we can make better decisions about drinking with our older more developed minds, or at least that is how I see it. Funny, the brain isn't fully developed until around 25, but that is a different subject. Having respect for the law, which is created to help protect us all and maintain order, helps keep the quality of life. A world full of crime would be a dangerous place. Not respecting the law could lead to more broken laws that can have dire consequences. I know I am giving a slippery slope example, but much of what influences our thoughts is subtle (and when we can't think straight we don't always make the best decisions). I want to maintain life and its quality so I am a big advocate for not drinking underage. During this trip legality isn't an issue for me as it is completely legal to drink here. The behavior is what gets to me. Part of that comes down to the expense and time spent in the activity. Drinking is often a means to an end, often social interaction. Hanging out at Student Affair parties in Portland I know that the more the alcohol means more social interaction, a lot more. For a lot of people drinking is a good investment as it gets them what they want. For me, I feel that drinking would be a waste of time. I am not saying that it is a waste for people if it gets them to that end, but spending time doing something to reach an end I can do without that mean is a waste for me. Add in the cost and it really becomes that. This time it comes to the pocketbook. I can think of so many other things I would like to spend my money on, like an amazing camera. I am aware that people can drink just because they enjoy drinking, but for me I don't want to find myself in that position. Loving a vice can make it harder to quit or resist when you need to.

 What I have loved about this trip, and several other parties I have been to, is that the people were generally being responsible. When people are drinking in such a way that they start acting really stupid, can't function normally, or become a danger to themselves or others my ethics raise a red flag. Going back to life and its quality, being intoxicated affects a person's ability to make good decisions. This means that they are more likely to make a decision that puts their life, or others, as well as the quality of their life in danger. This screams foul for my ethics because I value other people's lives and its quality. Looking at the monetary aspect, people spending money on alcohol could be spending it on things that improve the quality of life that they have in a healthier way, so that is negative to my overall ethics. Also, in my value of life, I like having "control" over myself. What would life be if we didn't have the ability to make our own intellectual decisions? I feel the quality of life is dependent on that freedom of choice and the ability to make the best choice, the decision that could improve your life or at least keep you alive. Without that control our quality of life is both decreased and has the greater chance to be significantly decreased due to our choices. This obviously adds a safety factor. The safer you are the less risk there is to life and its quality. Drinking can decrease that safety. I am not denying that drinking can be done responsibly or safely, I have seen this done both here and in the states, but I don't like that people take that risk of losing control, whether we know it or not. When it comes down to it, as long as people don't lose control my ethics are unscathed. Drinking for me though on this trip...I have decided just not to do it. Sorry Kameron, you can't live vicariously through me. I almost did drink and I had actually thought about doing it during this break. Instead my instincts kicked in and guided me not to drink and other matters have led me not to want to be associated with drinking. Of course their is other baggage too - stories for a different time. Drinking is legal here but I would rather just wait. It just feels right to me. After all, I have only 69 more days. Why start drinking a lot when I can say I didn't really start drinking until I was 21? Keeping to what I feel right is better than giving it up just because the opportunity is there to change the path I am walking.

Dinner was a bit of a flop. We went back to the bar where I had the amazing orange torte thing. Tonight was far less spectacular. I ended up ordering a hamberger. I felt like that was failure, as I have been avoiding anything that is "American". I guess what came out doesn't really count though. It tasted like it consisted of pork and had onion cooked right in. Kind of had a more rubbery consistency. The potato salad I had was just a tad oily - kind of like a salad dressing.

Will hasn't been sleeping too well, as I apparently have started snoring...a lot. In order to let him get more sleep I stayed up a later to let him get asleep before I do so he won't be kept up in case I start snoring.

Saturday, January 15, 2011

What Drives Us to Action:Temptation, Dreams, and Selfishness

Berlin, did you know I loved Nutella? I actually didn't see that there was hazelnut spread around my first time at the food area. I actually just got a little bit of scrambled egg (much better than the British version as it wasn't a gooey slop), a sausage, a piece of bacon, and some fruit yogurt, which turned out to be cherry, topped with some mix of granola. Absolutely wonderful. The hazelnut spread was actually brought to the table with a roll by Karissa. I just ended up with one of the packets and half the roll. So good.

Last night turned into a nightmare as I tried to get my converter to work so I could charge my laptop. I just couldn't get it to line up so that there would be power. Most of the time I would just get a split second of a charge. Currently Will's camera bag and three of my books are being used to prop the charger up in a position that allows it to charge. Last night it worked for about six minutes and then stopped. We gave up at this point. Being informed that Will travels like crazy over beds we shoved his towards the opposite wall, as he said he would literally move onto my bed and shove me off in his sleep, despite the hand width crack in between. Apparently I also talk in my sleep. I had a crazy dream last night, possibly the reason I was talking. It was all about this guy who was trying to take some Euros from this wood trough thing that held all these different currencies, which turned out to be only monopoly money (but the would be thief didn't know that). He I sense he wanted to take someone's Subaru and break into the house of the car owner as well. I wouldn't let him take the money, despite him taking out his police badge and demanding that I let him. I stopped him every time he tried to brush by me. I took pictures of him, which made him frown (hinting that he didn't want it taken), so I threatened to call the police but he didn't budge, as he didn't want to blow his cover. So did call. I ended up waking up before he was taken away. This all happened to be in a beautiful winter setting in Montana with the mountains in the background and I associated the day with Christmas.

Psychoanalysis of dreams - Kameron, where are you when I need you? Oh yeah the US...well then I guess I will just have to relate it all to ethics, morals, and some philosophers. In the dream I didn't know who's car it was, who's money, or the house. All I knew was that this person was going to take something that wasn't his. What was driving me? Duty to people. The quality of life these people had was going to be taken and I had the chance to stop it. Green Dot training 201 clearly had an impact. I have a duty to act because I am capable of acting. No crime, rape, or unjust action should be allowed just because of the bystander effect - where everyone stands around waiting for someone to act and in the end no one acts because they expect that someone else will. The more people, the more likely it is to happen - kind of like no one speaking in classes when they get bigger as everyone thinks someone else will. Defiant of that silence that bugs me I always speak if it goes too long, have the opportunity to stop something that shouldn't be happening and I try to act. Its also a lot easier in a dream, but I remember being afraid that the guy was going to shoot me, especially if I called the police. I called anyway. All I know is that if I don't act when I can, harm tends to come from the inaction.

That is what motivates me to action when people don't think I should act. The fact that what must be done must be done.

I after breakfast I reread my readings for a bit and then dozed off when our class was canceled for the day. Wondering what everyone else was doing we dressed to leave and discovered everyone was going a laundry run. I only had socks that needed attention, so I packed them up with a book to read and set off with the group. We had a vague idea where to go and ended up there quickly with directions. Thinking back, I don't really remember how we came back. It was quite the experience, being shown how to buy soap and the like. Set to wash, I left the store with Justin and the Carpenter sisters. Justin had to go to the bathroom so he stopped in a restaurant, which just happened to be next to a music store - with cellos! I went in and decided I would play one. The one that I liked the coloring of had an oddly low A string that was ridiculously close to the finger board. I settled for one about a 1000 Euros cheaper. They were all out of tune. I haven't tuned a cello in so long! Especially from no solid base! Thankfully an electric keyboard was right there and with Justin hitting keys for me every now and then I spent a good ten minutes getting it in tune. I then ask the woman for a bow and then rosin. I fine-tuned it and then I kind of played a little from something I had memorized. I didn't want to dig into the strings that much. Putting the cello back on the stand I went looking for music. I found one of the sazuki books, number three. I played for a little bit and then we had to go. It was a neat experience, getting to play a cello in Berlin. Never would've expected that!

Some people had seen a little joint to grab food at. It was almost an outside food cart, except it was attached to a building and had a small inside area where you could eat. Everyone, except for Justin, had the Currywurst with fries. The guy basically took the sausage and threw it in to fry with the fries. Then it was covered with this sauce that was something like barbecue and then put some curry on top. I loved the flavors, but I wasn't a fan of the sausage that much. I will probably give the sausage another go sometime this trip though. We also went to the bank and started our journey to find food for Justin, which quickly turned into visiting the market right next to our hotel. I bought some yogurt with raspberry something. The container had the fruit and the yogurt divided up so I had to mix them. I also got a roll, which just had a little melted cheese on it (Kase-schlemmer). So good. Maybe the currywurst wasn't filling enough. The last thing I got was some chocolate - Kuhflecken, which means cow spots. It looks like it is milk chocolate with white chocolate randomly spread out in it. The white chocolate turned out to be more decoration placed on top rather than going through the entire bar. I am only not realizing how far some companies reach into the world market. The chocolate was actually made by Kraft, under the name of Milka. (Branding is pretty crazy when you think about it) Axe deodorant goes by Lynx in the UK and you can't go somewhere without seeing Heinz ketchup.

When it came to dinner though, I felt bad. Michael wanted to go to a hockey game at 8. Number of people interested in hockey in our group, one. Thankfully Greg let him go as he wanted to go so badly but I felt bad that no one wanted to go. I have not so found memories of the only hockey game I went to - too loud, crazy, and plain old violent for me, but I was also a lot younger then too...I don't even remember where we were. My dad took me but we ended up leaving early because I disliked it so much. The problem was that no one wanted to really eat early. Kyle K and Meg joined him. Why didn't I? I can't deny I was selfish. Same for the game, I could've gone and it would've been an interesting experience, but I didn't really want to break off from the group and I wanted to get work done. Did I? No, not really. I ended up writing a few post cards - yes the entire time, I need to learn to write faster - and didn't really get much done besides a little typing. I feel like our group has been really great though about supporting each other in general, whether it means helping to feed the person who is starving, giving change over to make life easier, or going off with people do what they want to do, even if we don't want to completely. We help each other out because we want the same thing to happen for us when we really want to do something.

Dinner ended up at some bar/restaurant. I ordered something German that turned out to be a pork steak covered in this gravy mushroom mix with cheese on top and then broiled. I also had a side of mashed potato rolls. Some how they had kept the little things together and then fried them. Looked kind of like mozzarella sticks. Dipped in the gravy they were amazing. Kyle B said they were the type of food you would expect to order from Jack-in-the-Box at midnight. Dang, I would order them if they came to the states! We ended up at a sports bar that night. Largest beer mugs I had ever seen. Kind of reminded me of Snow-white and the Seven dwarfs, except with life sized people. I ended up ordering a piece of this Orange Cream Tore, which was soft, moist (sorry Braden), and light. The orange flavor was perfect too, strong but not over powering. I am not sure if this inspired the ordering of five more pieces of different tortes, but those got polished off so quick. Kyle actually offered me some of his beer tonight. I passed him up but almost didn't the second time. Kameron thought it was crazy that I was going abroad to Germany and wasn't going to drink anything. The torte distracted me though and I decided not to ask him if I could try it, even though the offer was there.

I left early with Greg so I could get some of my reading done. I ended up locked out of my room, which turned out to be great as I got to meet this girl named Gillian (with a G). She was part of the Maryland group. She invited me to hang out, but I passed hoping to get work done later. When she came back later though I took her up on the offer. Down at the bar I met some of her classmates and professor. I spent the next two hours with her and her friend John discussing everything: movies, actors, school, studying abroad, our trips so far, random people, Plutonic (yes, the girl had music by them), musicals, and what our plans were for the next day. Gillian was also going to go to the concentration camp too, so I wondered if we would see each other. She also invited me to two more events - her birthday on Tuesday and a dark restaurant, as in a completely dark restaurant where blind people serve you and you eat in the dark. That caught my interest! The problem was that I didn't want to break off from the group and if I did I would have to get someone to join. The cost, 34 Euro. It would be a really amazing experience but would easily blast four meals worth of money away.

I had a horrible night after that though and didn't get to sleep until after 3:45. I love friends who are there to talk though, even if they are lying in bed about to pass out from being so sick. Makes life so much easier. There I was being selfish again.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Dear Blog and Readers, I Digress to the Details of Randomness

Dear Blog and readers,

I have been writing on you (the blog - not the people) a lot, a good thing, but no one really needs to know about flying to Berlin and how I didn't do anything crazy so I won't write much - minus a lot of random stuff, like I fell in love with some crazy good potatoes at some cafe and have my first meal of wiener schnitzel, which reminds me completely of country fried stake without gravy. I know that the craziness of my journey in Berlin is going to be amazing - but you can wait for it. Don't worry the stories will come.

My room though is not very sound proof. It also comes with a mini balcony, a fire hazard of heater which is covered by the window curtains, and I am practically sharing a bed as the two horrible twin beds are placed right next to each other. Yes, Europe is running out of space quickly, I do realize this, hence the reason Will has figured out that I have an irregular breathing pattern - I breath in, hold it, and then breath out, all completely unconsciously. Our poor professor had his luggage lost, again, today. Apparently last year he arrived in England and his luggage never arrived. Now during the flight to Germany someone has stolen his again. I have a feeling he is a spy and the government of the UK is on to him and has been stealing his luggage to prevent him from doing his work or from taking information out. Maybe I should look into visiting all the places in the Bourne movies. On that subject running from the law seems like it would be a crazy thing in Europe. There are security cameras everywhere. EVERYWHERE! (Big Brother is watching! I should probably make sure there isn't one facing my window...) Doing a crime would totally get you caught if anyone knew when it happened or where. That said, I have heard more sirens in a day at Parkland than I have in the UK for a week! For a city, London has a peaceful quiet when it comes to obvious crimes. Then again, I also spent a lot of travel underground and not on the roads.

Back to the subject of beds, the Germans must be really bad at hospitality or sleep really cold, as these beds aren't very comfy, the pillow barely has anything to it, and the blanket, well lets just say it is more like a mattress pad right now because it if folded up. I fear if I unroll it it will be as thin as a sheet. Nothing, not small rooms, lack of wireless (cough, London), or this bed will ruin my trip. I will amend this statement tomorrow if need be. I will probably just get a second one to be a mattress pad and another one so I won't have to layer up. Will likes to sleep cold. Really cold. Normally I wouldn't have a problem but I don't have the same huge number of blankets that I have handy at school. Instead all I can do is have extra layers of clothing by my bed incase I need them. I love my polar fleece long-johns. They add so much warmth! I will probably be wearing them every day I have to go into Ingram this early spring just so I don't freeze.

Stonehenge Rocks, Harrods Costs a lot, and Relationships require Work

1/12/11

Stonehenge. A mass of rocks. Ok it was cooler than that, but somehow I expected it to be...bigger. We had a blast walking around but it would've been even greater to walk closer to them too. The drive up was nice, started off with watching a video and me illegally falling asleep during the video - my real crime was not buckling up in the bus. It was a wonderful nap. The countryside this time felt more alive than last time. Fog and cloud blended together in the distance, the silhouettes of grand trees off in the distance. The ground looked greener and the little growth looked taller. No longer was there a biting cold, only the damp fall of rain as the sheep sat peacefully twenty feet from our path. I even saw a sheep dog. The return ended up being the grandest time ever...yay for Cahill. It really was interesting, the stories of philosophers, stories, plays, and the lives of those in Greece. Coming back through the city though I dropped my book and looked around as we traveled the streets past small duplex houses, past businesses and schools, and finally past the streets filled with shopping.

Arriving back at one thirty we dropped off our stuff and then went back to Piccadilly Square. Here Justin, Will and I broke off with the two Carpenter sisters to eat. I have discovered that the British have mastered the art form of making on food into a ton of different versions. I had a Beef Stout pudding, which basically was a stake and ale pie. I also had mashed potatoes, peas, and sliced cooked carrots. It was a wonderful meal and as hardy as everything else we have had. We ended up at a huge sports store, five stories tall. Once again I was tempted to get some really neat looking shoes, this time several shades of brown with just a touch of blue. I decided not to get these shoes because I wasn't sure they would be that good. Maybe I should be more willing to just take a chance. I also passed up on some really cheap Under Armor type shirts...I am pretty sure that I have the lightest bag in the group so weight won't be a problem when coming back from Europe so I should've got them but I didn't really want to spend the money. Only now am I realizing that I will only get this chance once, or at least for a really long time, so I think I am going to be a little less frugal when it comes to things besides food.

You would also understand my frugalness if you had ever been in Harrods. Following behind the girls we, the guys, broke off to look at something more masculine than purses and bags. Ending up in the clothing area one of the first signs I was greeted with was "Items now all under 189 pounds." I looked at a jacket that was 300 pounds ($480)! I didn't even find a pair of jeans for less than $100. I even passed underwear that was $45! It was interesting to look around at all of these nice clothes, but it was unrealistic to even consider buying anything that wasn't in the discount gift store. The trip back to the hotel was uneventful. I started working on my blog posts once back in my room. Starting to fall asleep I heard a nock on my door. Everyone at the hotel was gathering to go out. We left and ended up walking around the Soho district, which had a ton of restaurants. Two of the places that were too full to eat at we discovered were gay pubs after we noticed the giant rainbow flag stories above the locations. We settled down in an Italian restaurant, waiting for the first time ever to be seated. It was absolutely worthy it. I had Penne Zorandetti, or something to that effect. I didn't have my moleskine to write it down. It was a cream sauce with saffron, shrimp, and salmon. It was amazing, but it left me wishing that I had more of the sauce. I also had a Fruitizer, which is supposedly a pomegranate and raspberry fruit juice drink. LIE! It is 100% fruit juice with a bit of carbonation but it is mostly apple juice (90%). It was good and sweet, but it didn't have the same kick of flavor I was expecting from the title. Instead I got that kick from desert, Sorbetti. The two flavors I got were lemon and blood-orange. These had such a strong flavor that they were hard to take. The lemon's kick made the blood-orange seem bitter. I ended up taking a small spoonful of each at the same time to counteract the strong flavors from making the other unbearable.

Random story - back in my room I blew nose. The amount of dirt in my snot was ridiculous! Thank you tube and smokers. That adds to the second thing I don't like about cities, the dirtiness that is in everything, even the air. Will came back to the room. We ended up talking about his night which involved some drinking and a lot of talking - about six hours worth. He had actually come on this trip planning to do some soul searching about what to do with a relationship he had just left. He found the answer. Relationships are about working through hard things in our lives to see if we can work with that person despite our flaws to overcome them and make the best relationship possible. After all, if we don't work through things, how can we not be afraid of committing to a relationship when we haven't practiced facing difficulty in a relationship without just bailing and leaving that person behind? No wonder so many marriages fail. It is not that there are a ton of people with bad ethics, people just haven't learned how to maintain a relationship for an extended period of time. This is what shows you if a relationship can work - time. Along the way you learn how to better maintain the relationship that you have and how to work though the difficulties of maintaining a relationship.